An Old World Manatee Christmas

The holidays were fast approaching and Scarlett, city manager of the Suncoast bayside town of Palmview, Manatee County, was busily arranging the nativity manger scene outside city hall. It was her favorite time of year, and this year was to be extra special, with her eight-year-old daughter Trixie starring in the nativity pageant planned for Christmas Eve. Since she lost her firefighter dad in a tragic accident last year, Trixie was channeling all her energy toward practicing for her debut solo of “Away in a Manger.”

But Scarlett was in for a rude surprise. Early one December morning, a large group of unruly, spirited young activists suddenly showed up at the Manatee County Commission meeting calling their group, “Christmas Voices of Southwest Florida.” They wore Santa suits and silently filed into the commission chambers, one by one. Outside Santa Claus-costumed activists carried signs saying, “Christmas Belongs at the Mall, Not City Hall!”, “Jingle Bells, Palmview Smells,” and “Our Christmas, Our Choice.” Scarlett’s jaw dropped.

As the activists launched a social media campaign and contacted the local ACLU chapter, they said they were prepared to sue Manatee County and the town of Palmview for allowing this establishment clause violation of the manger scene on public property. Scarlett fretted.

Later that week, Scarlett took Trixie down to the Bradenton farmer’s market. Trixie loved exploring the market looking for fresh berries or other sweet treats. However, this year Scarlett had trouble enjoying the market. As she passed a booth selling local Manatee county honey, she couldn’t help but remember all the years that Trixie and her father would enjoy honey-sweetened tea on Christmas Eve as Trixie tried in vain to stay awake for Santa. Scarlett looked down at Trixie carefully selecting a jar of honey, and thought about the horrible people that were trying to ruin Christmas for her daughter. She hadn’t had the heart to tell Trixie about the Santa-clad activists insisting Palmview cancel the city hall pageant. With her attention focused on her daughter, Scarlett didn’t notice the distinguished middle-aged gentleman walking briskly towards her.

Prince Nicholas, heir to the throne of the European Kingdom of Antedeluvia, was visiting Manatee County for several weeks at the end of the year to shop for real estate. He was interested in buying a number of investment properties throughout the county, as well as a new mansion in an exclusive gated neighborhood in Lakewood Ranch, the country’s number two best-selling community. On this particular morning, as he walked through the market, he was on the phone with his business partner finalizing plans for the grand opening of his brand-new Old World Ale Distillery on Manatee Avenue for Christmas Eve. As he argued intensely about the style of decorations at the grand opening, he didn’t notice the elegant dark-haired woman at the honey stand until he crashed into her.

Scarlett quickly found herself on the ground looking up at a middle-aged gentleman wearing an impeccably tailored suit and stylish grey cap. Nicholas immediately dropped his cellphone and helped Scarlett to her feet, apologizing profusely for his carelessness.

“It really isn’t your fault,” Scarlett assured him. “I was just so absorbed with those cursed cosplaying Clauses that I didn’t see you coming. They are going to ruin Christmas and there is nothing we can do about it.”

Nicholas knew just who Scarlett was referring to. He had read about the disruptive Christmas choice activists in the Observer just that morning. He shared Scarlett’s concern, for he found himself growing deliriously fond of his newly adopted community. Prince Nicholas had just locked down his kingdom of Antedeluvia due to a new outbreak of the novel coronavirus pandemic for three weeks. With his people snug in their homes and beds for the winter, Prince Nicholas had globe-trotted to Florida to spend the Christmas holiday with his new friends in his new community. He was so proud and pleased of the way the community had accepted him, putting him right on the front pages of the Black Tie section of the Observer newspaper. He had been attending one charity gala after another, looking for a special gal to spend the holidays with. After all, he was the most eligible Antediluvian bachelor in Lakewood Ranch.

Nicholas had been saddened to hear that local Santa activists were haranguing the hapless city manager of Palmview. And now that he had met Scarlett and her delightful daughter Trixie, the matter became more personal. He was not one to back down from a fight and most certainly not accustomed to not getting his way. Nicholas was determined to find a way to stop these Santa impersonators from winning their War on Christmas. He huffed and puffed about the matter with Scarlett at the market and they made plans to meet for coffee the next day at the Sage Biscuit Cafe. That gave him just 26 hours to come up with a plan to save Christmas, but he was certain that he was up for the challenge.

That evening, Nicholas wandered the streets of Bradenton, pondering this Christmas dilemma. He pondered, and pondered, and ponder, and eventually he noticed that his footsteps were taking him towards the Old World Distillery that he was planning to open in three days on Christmas Eve. As he walked past New Hope Church towards the distillery, he was struck by an idea — an idea that might just save Christmas for Trixie and all the townsfolk of Palmview.

Nicholas was excited when he arrived for coffee the next day. As they sipped lattes at the Sage Biscuit Cafe, he quickly told Scarlett of his plan. Scarlett immediately assented, as the Santa activists had been incredibly clever in reaching out to national media to attack the city of Palmview for its stance. They were on the verge of being a featured story on Slate magazine and other online publications, drawing negative attention to Palmview’s practices.

Scarlett reached out to the Observer with the new plan, so they could get the exclusive story. The manger scene and pageant would be moved to New Hope Church on Christmas Eve, the church right next to the Old World Distillery that Prince Nicholas planned to open on Christmas Eve. Trixie would be able to have her solo debut after all! And the town would be able to enjoy Christmas, just in a different location than their old tradition. “It’s an old tradition made new!” exclaimed Prince Nicholas, beaming with Scarlett’s agreement.

Huge crowds from Palmview and the entire community of Manatee County hustled into New Hope Church on Christmas Eve. They oohed and aahed over the children’s delightful performances, and especially Trixie’s marvelous alto solo. She was so brave after enduring such a hard year and the loss of her father. She looked as radiant as an angel.

As the pageant ended, the townsfolk exited out the narthex of the church into the parking lot, where they were ringed with the Christmas sweater-wearing Santas of Christmas Voices of Southwest Florida. They were singing carols of their own and ringing bells. “Let’s all meet at the new Old World Distillery for a brew after this!” the activists and townsfolk said to each other.

Prince Nicholas grinned from ear to ear, as he stood outside the distillery, welcoming the townsfolk into his pub. “You saved Christmas, Nicholas!” exclaimed Trixie.

Scarlett gave him a devilish look, with arched eyebrows. “You certainly did, my prince.”

Prince Nicholas leaned in for a kiss with Scarlett. The Antedeluvian Prince had found just the woman he was looking for.

“Merry Christmas, Saint Nick,” said Scarlett, as she embraced him with a kiss. “This Old World touch was just what Manatee County and Palmview needed for a new image.”

“With the manger and pageant’s new home at the church, the War on Christmas is over,” declared Prince Nicholas.

The End

Written with Matt Lepinski.